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Today is my 34th birthday! It seems a little odd to write that because I don’t feel 34, nor do I act like a typical 34 year old. I am often mistaken for someone much younger because of my personality and . . . looks? I often treat my birthdays similarly to New year’s; a time for introspection, review, and future goals. It is with reflection, that I realized despite sharing four years of my time on 19th Century Modern, you may not actually know me. I aim to rectify that by providing a sort of question and answer piece, to let you glimpse behind the curtain. I used questions gleaned online from dating and marriage counseling sites; some are funny, others are more serious minded. Be forewarned all of these answers are raw and unvarnished, perhaps more than you care to know. Most of these questions have not been answered in the four years on this blog, although some were answered way back in the first year, but I’m never sure how far readers dig into blog archives nor at what point you enter 19th Century Modern. . .

  1. Do you have any nicknames? What are they?
    1. Dee Dee, Dee Dee Dinah, Deeds, Whitelock
  2. Do you consider yourself a morning person or a night owl?
    1. I am an extreme morning person. I usually wake up around 3 am. I enjoy the time when the world is sleeping; I get so much accomplished in a leisurely manner before I get to work.
  3. elephantWhat are two items on your bucket list?
    1. Zip-lining and visit/volunteer at an elephant orphanage in Africa
  4. What is something you are financially saving up at this moment?
    1. My up-coming trips to Los Vegas, The Cruise, and Peru.
  5. Do you believe in aliens?
    1. Yes. I believe it is arrogant to think in the vastness of the universe that we are the only sentient beings.
  6. Salty snacks or dessert?
    1. dessertDesserts! I am my father’s daughter in that regards. There are two types of people in this world: those that order appetizers and those that order dessert. I almost never order hor d’oevures but frequently order dessert!
  7. What do you think is the most important life lesson for someone to learn?
    1. To be self-aware/self-analytical. To be real with yourself. It is ugly business, but know why you have the insecurities you have, why you do the things you do, the good and the bad. Why do you like the things you like? Why?! Not many people know themselves, because they are afraid of the truth and don’t want to deal with the reality of not being the person they image themselves to be.
  8. What was the last book you read?
    1. Proof of Heaven by Eben Alexander III
  9. What was your major in college?
    1. Bachelor’s of Arts in Interior Design, Masters in Information and Library Science
  10. teaCoffee of tea?
    1. Tea! I do not like the smell and taste of java. I am not a big tea drinker and I always have it straight when I do, rarely if ever putting sugar in it. I prefer hot tea, but I’m leery about it staining the teeth, so I don’t drink it very much.
  11. What is one thing people would be surprised to know about you?
    1. At my core, I am a philosopher, dreamer, and investigator of metaphysics. A very serious person in a scholarly vein.–That is not the side that I present to world on the daily basis though for it is far too heavy, uncomfortable, and mentally exhausting to be around 24/7. –I know, because they’ve told me so.
  12. What were you like as a child?
    1. I was a very morbid, serious child. Obsessed with the afterlife, angels, history, and psychology. Very hermit-like. Not exactly an outdoor nor social girl, by any means. I didn’t really lighten-up and become fabulous until college.
  13. Is it important to have separate hobbies and interest from your significant other?
    1. Absolutely. I learned this with my first boyfriend when I was 20. I was practically a wife, because I didn’t know any better. Nor did I have any examples of the difference between a girlfriend and a spouse was. All my friends in high school didn’t really date and none of them had actual boyfriends. I lost myself in that first relationship and lost some of my friends as a result. Lesson learned. Never again.
  14. What is your approach to health?
    1. foodI am slowly moving more toward a more paleo diet. Granted, after the whole incident with my jaw at the beginning of the year, I have come to love going meatless for dinners. Light dinners are the way to go. I enjoy taking long walks in the extreme morning under the stars, hours before the sun makes its ascent. Basically, I could walk for days. I could do crunches, lat-pulls, the rowing machine and the stair-stepper for the rest of my life. My main fitness goal right now is regaining the flexibility of my time as a child gymnast. However, I am reading up on meditation and mindfulness with much delight!
  15. Are you satisfied with the quality and quantity of your friends?
    1. I love my friends dearly and schedule time with them, in a most rigid like fashion to which I refer to as playdates. For those out of town, I meet every other month. For those in nearby states I see every three or four months, depending. If we are unable to schedule something, I update them with an excessively long snarky email.
  16. What are your thoughts on religion? Which, if any, do you practice?
    1. My thoughts on religion have shifted a great deal. Right now, I view them all with respect. I consider myself Christian, still, but I am studying comparative religion, religion as an institution, and spirituality. How they are the same and how they differ. I grew up around people of various faiths. Also my favorite late Aunt and Uncle were of different faiths; she, a Seventh-Day Adventist, and he, a practicing Catholic. They were happily married for years. He drove her to the assembly meetings on Saturday and she send him off to Mass on Sundays with a kiss.
  17. Your straight answer on children?
    1. There isn’t one. Two years ago, I would have balked at the idea. Now I am more open to it, but afraid of ‘death in childbirth’ (long held childhood fear) and the complete and utter disruption of my life. I’m working on overcoming these fears.
  18. Best way to communicate with you?
    1. Words. Hands down, without a doubt! Someone who can articulate what s/he is truly trying to convey. Ideally, someone who is a better speller than I (which isn’t saying much). I like my friends sharp-witted and tolerant, snarky and liberal. I have mentioned before in this blog, “speak to my intellect with spiritual maturity and you’ll find your way into my heart.” Or using a pop-culture analogy: I want my friend and/or significant other to have the wit of Iron Man/Tony Stark and the heart of Captain America/Steve Rogers.
  19. How do you handle a disagreement?
    1. I’ve matured in this area, you’ll be happy to know! I tend to bite my tongue, until I can compose myself accordingly. If push comes to shove, I can be rather scathing, unfortunately. Some times a knee-jerk tantrum will appear, but will quickly be smothered as soon as it comes. Word to the wise, if I am ever cleaning the tub in a furious tense silent, be afraid. Be very afraid. –Some passive aggressive evil might slip out! Thus said, it takes something cataclysmic to upset me that much. In fact, a co-worker just asked me this week if I ever get angry. These moments are so very rare I can tell you how frequently I get upset in a year, using one hand.
  20. How do you feel about debt?
    1. I don’t like it. I don’t have any of it, save for my mortgage.
  21. Are you a spender or a saver?
    1. Oh my gosh, I’m a saver! If I don’t have it, I don’t spend it. Simple as that.
  22. peruWhere would you like to travel?
    1. Peru, Africa, China. The Fairmont in Banff, Canada. The Biltmore in Asheville, North Carolina. The Hearst Castle, in San Simeon in California. Return to Madrid, Spain. Always Madrid.
  23. Favorite holidays?
    1. Christmas for the magic, innocence, and wonder. And the pageantry . . . I just really like the store windows! And my birthday! I prefer to celebrate on the actual day, rather than wait for the weekend when people are available. Needless to say some years are more quiet than others, but that is fine by me.
  24. What type of house do you want to live in?
    1. Currently I reside in a cottage (less than 1,500 square feet). Depending on my marital status, I might move into a bungalow (1,500-1,999 feet square) in the future. If I never get married, I’m sticking to smaller dwellings. No sense in wasting space. My cottage’s core inspiration is “Sleeping Beauty”/’Rustic’ Princess, but my next home will be more Art Nouveau.
  25. Which would you choose–dishes or laundry?
    1. clothesOh my goodness, laundry! Laundry, any day. I loathe to wash the dishes, as I do them by hand. It was a hated chore as a child, because my hands would turn into prunes and felt bizarre.
  26. At what age would you like to retire?
    1. Death. –I cannot conceive a world where I’d retire. I love my job too much. Taking away my job, is taking away my joy. Why would you do that?!
  27. What is your favorite board game?
    1. Clue!–I’ve never lost a game in my life.
  28. What are the weirdest things you’ve ever eaten?
    1. I’ve had a few things my peers think of as gross: snake, lamb, veal, quail, tongue, blood, boar, elk, bison . . .  I know in some cultures these are practically staples, but alas the average person’s diet is rather limited. And these items are not every day American fare.
  29. Where else have you lived?
    1. Tempe, Arizona; Centerville, Ohio; Strongsville, Ohio; Chandler, Arizona; Flagstaff, Arizona; Tucson, Arizona, Casa Grande, Arizona
  30. Are you close to any extended family members?
    1. Yes my two youngest cousins of my youngest Tio/Uncle, Mlle A and Mlle V. I used to call them “my friends” all the time, but sometime in High School, it was like “Oh, yeah, they’re my cousins!”–Not might brightest moment . . .
  31. What was your favorite subject in school and why?
    1. English and art. Some things never change, eh? The beauty and creativity. Creation and control of worlds previously unknown.
  32. Would you/could you ever be naked in public?
    1. Okay, this might seem counter intuitive. I am honestly fine with my body. Is it the hottest and most tone physique you’ll ever see? Heck, no! –It is just that other people may be offended by a nude woman and still others would be aroused at the sight. I do not want to turn anyone on, nor do I want to offend. If I could walk around in the buff and not cause these reactions, I would do it, in a heartbeat.–I’m not modest, just considerate.
  33. What is your favorite color?
    1. Indigo! That weird hue between blue and violet, where you can’t tell which color it really is.
  34. What are some prominent events that have happened to you in the past that have made you who you are today? Difficult times causes us to grow, so this list may be a bit much for some as there aren’t many happy events mentioned:
    1. molested at the age of 5 years old by two men in the church which led to 25 year male complex and equally long time in therapy
    2. Family adopted a cocker spaniel
    3. Junior year of high school I wrote a letter to a boy (not a crush, but popular guy–difficult to explain), but he sought me out to thank and hugged me. –It was the first time a non-family member male touched me. I bawled for half an hour in the girl’s room. I was so confused. This was my favorite memory of high school.
    4. At 20 years old first boyfriend
    5. At 23 first and catastrophic break-up, which lead to two suicide attempts.
    6. Second boyfriend, who was a divorced father.
    7. During graduate school lost 6 people on my father’s side of the family in less than 18 months.
    8. Adopted Buttons, my goober of a cocker-spaniel
    9. Started my career in 2009
    10. Met a wonderful man in 2010, engaged in 2014, who then ripped out my heart by ending the engagement on August 2nd, 2015.

Considered yourself caught up to speed on my life behind the screen. No pity, just lessons. It may not be pretty, but it is strong information. It may not be “historical” but it is still real. This is me. This is what 34 looks like.


This is 34