“Each has its lesson; for our dreams in sooth, come they in shape of demon, gods, or elves are allegories with deep hearts of truth that tell us solemn secrets of ourselves.”–Henry Timrod.
And would you like to know my Elven truth? All my life I harbored a secret deep in the recesses of my heart.–I wanted to be a writer, but the idea of actually succeeding caused me to run in the opposite direction from my yearnings. While no longer a wee elven child, the fantasy and lure of legends still remains. Due to converging circumstances, I dig my feet in, square my shoulders and defiantly eye the seemingly adult creature in the looking glass. Today, I take a stand. It is high time I pick up the pen and write the story of my dreams!
As a small girl I obsessed over the written word. A voracious reader and avid daydreamer, I concocted my own fables and poetry for my dollies and teddy bears. Even the family dog was recruited occasionally to play the role of a valiant stead or lumpy toadstool, the role he most loved to play. However, once I began to put pen to paper, I never finished the stories. I exhausted myself with research, minutiae, character development, and world building.
Even when my poem was published at the age of nine in The Ebbing Tide, it did not spur any more outpouring of greatness. Instead, I kept repeating my brother’s horrifying words in my head and like a broken record, “Don’t be a writer or a poet. You won’t make any money until you’re dead.–Don’t be a writer or a poet, you won’t make any money.–Don’t be a writer. . . .” At the time, I burst into tears and raced to my father and asked if brother spoke the truth. Despite reassuring me many people make a living out of writing, Father did cede there are times when death increases the sales value of publications. I latched on to the negative comment and halted writing for a few years.
Now, I want to take up the quill and prove my brother wrong. It could be called an immature motive, but magic is often created out of the ashes of adversity. It is not only my brother who sparked the flame; I want to prove it to myself that I can do this, regardless of my age. I am not a dead elf yet. I still have plenty of time.
I am also doing this partially for the money. I am not going spread falsehoods. Who doesn’t entertain the idea of getting paid to do something they love? As you may know, I set a goal to pay off the mortgage to my cottage as soon as possible. The extra income from writing will expedite the completion of that quest.
Will I be the next Tolkien, Lewis, Rowling, or Martin? No. I will be of the House Davis, the Pale, the First of My Name, Queen of the Broken Ears, Queen of the IceSkins, the Doyenne and First of the Elves, Lady of the Four Kingdoms, Protector of the Puppies, Princess of the Underdogs, Breaker of Doubts and Mother to No One. I am not claiming to write the next great American novel (not yet, anyways–allow some time), but simply to be a published writer.
Numerous factors prompted this resurgence of author motivation. Starting with the seed of hope that never died. Steve Kamb’s book Level Up Your Life also contributed heavily to this ambition. He suggests viewing life as a massively multi-player role playing game. Tap into an empowering alter ego, such as fierce elf who can take on any boss in the realm. Turn goals into epic quests to live out long-held-dreams and make them happen. Happen-NOW! I do love the book and the organization that spawned it. I penned a post regarding the program a few weeks ago here.
With my spiritual bent, I was also noticing signs of the universe in the form of . . . benign spiders. There are myriad associations for arachnids, least which is associated with writing. “What a tangled web we weave . . . ” Does this sound familiar? I notice more and more spiders than ever before. This time, I took the hint. The force of The Call grows stronger the more I resist. (These insects are not inside my home, should you be wondering.)
The finally push in accepting my blessed fate was a lovely comment from one of you Dear Readers. See? You have the power to motivate with the smallest act of a kind word. Do not believe you are voiceless, I know otherwise. The praise took me entirely by surprise and solidified my decision to go on this journey. With your encouragement, I am eager to start the process.
My plan is to start small and get back into the habit of scholarly authorship. I will spend a few weeks reviewing different sites and publications that may benefit from my inclinations and expertise.
If you know of a site or publication to which my voice and varied knowledge would be appreciated with paid service, I would be most grateful for a recommendation, either in the comment section or my email via the About the Authoress page.
I will work on some drafts and meticulously edit before submitting anything. I feel I am best suited for editorial/personal pieces, but I am wiling to venture out of my comfort zone and try new genres and topics of interests. At the moment, I do not have “a whole tome within me urging to break free.” Yet, who knows when inspiration will strike? My mentality is to just get out there and submit, not working on perfecting Rivendell before I turn a piece in. I am not an oracle of old who is able to predict the future nor divine precisely what each site and publication wants, but I can go in with the expectation that there are no mistakes in life.
Besides, who says you cannot dream in your waking hours? Many people are living out their childhood dreams–and beyond! I am eager to join the ranks. It will take effort but I am prepared to train to achieve my Elven truth. Besides writing is never “work,” I find it far too much fun for that! This elf simply walks to Mordor.
I will continue update this page with links as my writing gets published.